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Second Chances?


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#1 Guest_Jay_*

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 09:03 PM

Would you ever give a former friend of yours who is a guy a second chance if he cheats with his girlfriends?

#2 MadameMary

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 09:09 PM

I really don't think i'd still be able to be good friends with him..
I'd be nice and civil but i wouldn't be able to think of him the same.

#3 i.am.me

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 09:53 PM

Just a thought, but people certainly don't treat their significant others like they treat their friends. Ideally, a good character is still a good character no matter what the circumstances...but most people compartmentalize their relationships. I have male cousin who is extremely protective and caring of me, but he treats the women that he dates very differently. He is a great brother, a good friend, but a terrible boyfriend.

Your friends are not going to be perfect because there are no perfect people. If you do not want to be his friend because he cheated in a past relationship (in which you were not part of, really) then perhaps it is better that this person also does not possess your friendship. If, on the other hand, you were very close friends with one of the past girlfriends, then that complicates the relationship a little more. I just think that when we are overly righteous, this behaviour isolates us from the people around us (personal experience)...because many people are guilty of many things that we don' t know about. If you cannot be friends with this person anymore, just be cordial and keep your thoughts to yourself.

Edited by iampheng, 31 December 2012 - 09:55 PM.


#4 WilIiam

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 04:49 AM

No. its either all or nothing for me.

#5 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 08:14 AM

No, of course not. Girls normally teach guys continue bad behavior by forgiving. Guys do what they want and just say sorry, buy flowers and everything is forgiven.. And some girls even let them repeat tis sh*t. What is sense of that? Guys could really learn something if they are kicked out of cheating. Maybe they don't cheat that girl they want to keep in the end.

#6 MadameMary

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 12:19 PM

Like i said i'd still be civil and friendly with him.
I just won't actually put effort in a friendship with them or trust them that much.

I try not to surround myself with people who cheat, lie, bully, abuse animals/women/men/children or people who steal.
I'm an overal friendly person especially offline i'm all smiles and friendliness and i don't care what they look like, their religion, sexuality or if they are poor/rich smart/dumb but there are just some types of people with behaviour i don't want to associate with.

Edited by MadameMary, 01 January 2013 - 12:20 PM.


#7 WilIiam

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 01:40 PM

Some people dont even know how to apologise.

#8 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 01:54 PM

Some people dont even know how to apologise.


Guys rarely know how to apologise, they just rush up into make up sex... Also they most of time are the one who are acting badly and then wait a girl is sorry... "She will be sorry for couple of days" Just don't message, speak or call and she starts to afraid of losing you and is sorry and you are the king, lol.. Some girls are always sorry and some... Not!

If a guy would be very sorry and would cut a finger or 2 of him because of wanting feel the pain he caused to me I could consider forgiveness. I would also kick and torture him.... Not really, I could not do that and that is also why I don't forgive. There is nothing he could do to balance situation back, he could not take my pain away anyway so being sorry means nothing. Also he would repeat that sh*t forever because he would just think if he cheats that only costs couple of fingers and toes to him.. He has 20 so he could cheat 20 times without worries.

#9 WilIiam

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 04:07 PM

Guys rarely know how to apologise, they just rush up into make up sex... Also they most of time are the one who are acting badly and then wait a girl is sorry... "She will be sorry for couple of days" Just don't message, speak or call and she starts to afraid of losing you and is sorry and you are the king, lol.. Some girls are always sorry and some... Not!

If a guy would be very sorry and would cut a finger or 2 of him because of wanting feel the pain he caused to me I could consider forgiveness. I would also kick and torture him.... Not really, I could not do that and that is also why I don't forgive. There is nothing he could do to balance situation back, he could not take my pain away anyway so being sorry means nothing. Also he would repeat that sh*t forever because he would just think if he cheats that only costs couple of fingers and toes to him.. He has 20 so he could cheat 20 times without worries.


Oh wow...i am lucky not to be your boyfriend.

#10 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 04:19 PM

Oh wow...i am lucky not to be your boyfriend.


And I thought you wanted to be Posted Image

And btw I am nice Posted Image Think about those wifes which are willing to cut his dolphin Posted Image One threw it into river and other flush it in toilet... But really... What is whole point of a rls and love if people cheat? If you are in love you simple stick with her or him, if you get bored you break up and find a better one... Why to hell stick with some stupid cow which you are not even in love with? Just for the free lunches and laundry?

#11 nomad 822

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 04:39 PM

... But really... What is whole point of a rls and love if people cheat? If you are in love you simple stick with her or him, if you get bored you break up and find a better one... Why to hell stick with some stupid cow which you are not even in love with? Just for the free lunches and laundry?


Exacto. Either remain monogamous, and keep the fidelity in a relationship ... or move on and explore as a single, if the urge to cheat or sample other varieties is there. So simple.

Same for women "keeping tabs" on husbands and bfs like hawks. Whatever for?

It's NOT victory that he didn't stray, or joy that he loves the family.
It's just credit to the wife for being tireless 24/7 supervision ... and being a vilgilant prison warden.
How exhausting, and how fake. (see one bee ... bat it away ... what about all those bees unseen? Yet there are so many willing to live out the rest of their lives like that)

Keeping faithful in a relationship should be spontaneous and natural, NOT forced.
I never bought into the logic of keeping up the farce of a relationship, just for the sake of keeping up a relationship.

Edited by nomad 822, 01 January 2013 - 04:42 PM.


#12 WilIiam

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 03:35 AM

And I thought you wanted to be Posted Image

And btw I am nice Posted Image Think about those wifes which are willing to cut his dolphin Posted Image One threw it into river and other flush it in toilet... But really... What is whole point of a rls and love if people cheat? If you are in love you simple stick with her or him, if you get bored you break up and find a better one... Why to hell stick with some stupid cow which you are not even in love with? Just for the free lunches and laundry?


Whether in love or not is not an issue. The main issue for ladies is they want to be loved and cared by the man who would give her the most love, more than her parents would. He would protect her and provide her with the best that he can. Security and stability is most important to any woman. To be honest, most ladies look strong on the outside, however, inside is dependent and vulnerable like a flickering candle exposed in the strong wind aka harsh world. Hence they want to be in the best shelter that they can find so their fire can keep burning strongly and safety.

#13 teddyc

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 05:17 AM

No. Cheaters are cheaters. Period, full stop. Dump the cheater and find yourself someone new.

#14 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 07:51 AM

Whether in love or not is not an issue. The main issue for ladies is they want to be loved and cared by the man who would give her the most love, more than her parents would. He would protect her and provide her with the best that he can. Security and stability is most important to any woman. To be honest, most ladies look strong on the outside, however, inside is dependent and vulnerable like a flickering candle exposed in the strong wind aka harsh world. Hence they want to be in the best shelter that they can find so their fire can keep burning strongly and safety.


I think the love what I want from my man is very different for what my parents gave me. But what is what disturbs you of being in love like hell with someone? That she would love you like a crazy and you would like her back as much crazy.. You have a wife already too william.. Why you don't love her fullest? Why you don't want to protect her? Why you are disturbed when she is feeling weak? Don't you have weak days? Don't you show them to her? Should you? What is wrong to live in a nice, warm cave? It is better than cold one, right? If your wife is too vulnerable and her fire does not please you why you choosed her? Why did you not took someone from the navy or army? Maybe you should be gay? Maybe you are and that is why your wife is not enough for you. As you told earlier you have feelings for someone else too. Try a man for change. maybe he would be strong as you and you could live in a windy magpies nest. Just set fires together because you are so damnet strong, set each others in the fire in a sea. What to hell you are whining all the time that women are too weak for you, take a man damnet.

#15 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 08:00 AM

And also willian, next time you see someone in a forum feeling blue nobody force you to support her. If you are so disgusted by weak women start by staying away from them.

#16 WilIiam

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 08:59 AM

Posted Image

Not all women are weak, the one below isnt.
Posted Image

#17 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 09:49 AM

Not all women are weak, the one below isnt.


That is why fairytales are the best Posted Image



Can't you leave my heart alone? This is what I am saying... Walk away.. If you already have someone just walk away... Why guys are so addicted to break as many hearts as they can in their life time? .. Just walk away because you are too blind to find it.. To find a one heart what would be enough to you.

#18 MichaelD

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 04:45 PM

Would you ever give a former friend of yours who is a guy a second chance if he cheats with his girlfriends?


It is none of my business what he/she does with their gf/bf as long as I am no part of it. It is on them. They are just my friend I dont have the time to give a sheet.

#19 Linnh

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 05:08 PM

When you have been cheated on a few times then you know the feeling and it will be hard to accept cheaters. At least for me. But I always give people a second chance IF they regret what they have been doing.

#20 QuattroBajina

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 05:23 PM

When you have been cheated on a few times then you know the feeling and it will be hard to accept cheaters. At least for me. But I always give people a second chance IF they regret what they have been doing.


I agree with you on giving second chances.. no one is perfect, people make mistakes when you think about it.. it's just unfortunate some people choose to make these hurtful choices, however if these people are truly sorry and really see what they did was wrong, I don't see why not give these people a chance. It's easy to say that you're never going to do something like cheating but you never know.

#21 Kim4ever

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 05:24 PM

Theres no second chances with me. But since the Question is about a former friend then its none of my damn business what he gets up to.Posted Image

#22 shar0n

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Posted 03 January 2013 - 01:48 PM

Posted Image

#23 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 03 January 2013 - 02:50 PM

I wish I could
hurt you the way
you hurt me...


I wish there would be some magic to hurt guys like they hurt us but how could we hurt them back when most of them have no feelings? Being hurt is a feeling too and if they cannot feel they cannot be hurt. That is what I cannot stand in guys.. They are like stones, no feelings, no emotions.

#24 shar0n

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Posted 04 January 2013 - 01:57 AM

I dont wanna talk about it. He commited sin and I mitigated it. Its becos of too much love that he can hammer me for so long till I am already half alive and barely breathing


#25 Guest_Guest_*

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Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:38 AM

I dont wanna talk about it. He commited sin and I mitigated it. Its becos of too much love that he can hammer me for so long till I am already half alive and barely breathing


I know that feeling. I would describe mine of a movie where a person is dying and is lying in a ground and cough her last bloods out. That is exactly what guys cannot feel, what a shame.If they would know anything about rhonchus of a death they would traet women better. Stay strong shar0n Posted Image

#26 Guest_yalam_*

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Posted 04 January 2013 - 01:54 PM

Your lacking in self esteem and ability to trust people makes you a manipulative person. Whatever unhappiness in the past, treat it as you are mitigrating your sins /past karma. As you cannot change the past, you can only look forward no matter how painful it is, there is nothing you can do anyway. The only way to change your destiny and future is to change your perspective in life and people. Not everyone in life is bad or evil or come to collect debt. Your narrow minded and selfish. You cannot see your flaws. The only way is to forgive those who hurt you before and look forward with open heart.

#27 Aspire

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Posted 05 January 2013 - 05:51 PM

I have had a few friends whom I witnessed cheating on their girlfriends while they were away from town. It was really disappointing, as I also once had a crush on one of the guys. I then realised that even as really good friends you don't necessarily see every side of that person. But hey, they are still human and mistakes are sure to be there, so...

I still remain friends with most of the people who have done wrong stuff to me or to others that I think is inappropriate. Those guys that cheated, I'm still friends with them because I don't want to lose the friendship just because of some stuff that doesn't relate to me. We just don't talk about what they have done anymore because that was in the past. But if it's a boyfriend then I suppose it's a different story.